Hell is not Pakistan: Parrikar is Wrong
Referring to an infiltration bid which was foiled on Monday by the Indian Army, he said, “Kal humare jawano ne paanch logon (terrorists) ko wapas bhej dia, #Pakistan mein jaana aur nark (#hell) mein jaana ek hi hai (Our soldiers sent back five terrorists yesterday. Going to Pakistan is same as going to hell).”
However, we don’t agree with Parrikar’s view and neither does the venerable Congress party whose leader and ex-MP Ramya said “Pakistan is no hell”
Ramya is absolutely right though a little off target. Our detailed investigation has found that ‘Hell is no Pakistan’. While roaming in hell (with no insurance cover), our brave reporters met with its prominent citizens, including Hitler, Mussolini, Kasab and Aurangzeb and Jinnah. We can now confirm that there are major differences between Pakistan and Hell.
- Hell is somewhere in Ether, Pakistan is on…Earth
- All are equal in Hell, unlike in Pakistan where a few dozen feudal families rule the land.
- It took Hell millions of years to reach its present state of perfection, while Pakistan just took 70 years.
- Hell is far far away from India, Pakistan is our ‘friendly’ neighbour.
- Whoever comes to hell has no doubt about what to expect; Pakistan was formed by people who thought it would be a heaven for Indian Muslims.
- Atrocities committed in hell are due to people’s own past acts, not in God’s name; but in Pakistan…
- Hell has a single Sheriff (Satan) while Pakistan is ruled by two Shariffs.
- Every religion has its own hell but Pakistan is hell for the followers of all religions.
To be fair to Parrikar, there indeed are a few similarities between Hell and Pakistan. Everyone wants to get out of these two accursed lands and no one visits there willingly. Also, there’s nothing worse than Hell in afterlife, Pakistan does the same excellent job ‘before’ the afterlife.
But these similarities are minor and do not refute the fact that our honourable Defence minister was wrong in comparing Pakistan to Hell. Hopefully Congress will appoint a much better-informed Ramya as our Defence Minister, if it ever comes to power again.